From Ashes To Amen

Welcome to my blog! This is a space the Lord has called me to create – where faith meets honesty, and biblical truth meets real life. Here, we talk about the hard things: the questions people avoid, the struggles we carry quietly, the convictions that challenge us, and the hope that anchors us. My heart is to dig deep into scripture, uncover what the Bible really says, and walk with you through topics that refine, stretch, and strengthen our faith. Whether you're seeking clarity, comfort, or understanding of God's word, this is a place for raw truth, grace, and spiritual growth. I'm so glad you're here.

my testimony

My mom has been seeking God her entire life. When you are searching when you have 5 kids, well, they go with you. I have been to a few churches growing up but each one, never stuck. From Episcopal church to Jehovah Witness, to even LDS. I remember doing the coloring books in the Episcopal church. I remember always being late and being in this small room with a window to see the service for the Jehovah Witness church. The Church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints (Mormon) was the church we attended the longest and I have the most memories from. I absolutely loved that church. I had so many friends and everyone there was so kind. There was one year where my parents couldn’t afford Christmas and that morning of, we went outside and our porch was covered in presents and groceries for my family. Best Christmas ever. Now for where it all began.

I believe I was about 12 years old when something in my soul was not clicking right. I now know it was conviction, but I could not get myself to read to book of Mormon. I just knew I was not supposed to. I got baptized in the church when I was 13, only because my sister did, and the feeling still then never went away. Years later when I was 16, I was with this guy for almost a year and one day he ended it with me because of the church I was attending. It made no sense to me because he went to church and so did I. So, what was the issue? I began to do research on the church and followed my intuition as well. Many teachings made no sense to me. Why do I need to be sealed in the temple to be with my family in heaven? Baptisms for the dead? Why is one thing said and then changed? I thought God didn’t change. And much more just was not clicking to me. When it came to the history of the church, that’s a whole other thing. I ended up leaving the church that year and never attended any church for almost 5 years. I was too afraid to be taught the wrong things. For those years, it was just me and God.

In January of 2024, I prayed to God and asked Him to bring someone into my life who would show me that church isn’t bad. That February, a girl who was a couple years younger than me, started at my work. She was going on a mission trip and that caught my attention. You can do missions trips without being Mormon. Interesting. I started asking her questions about it and from there we would spend weeks having 10-hour conversations a day about God, life, the bible, and religion. One day, she asked me what church I went to and well, I didn’t go to any. I refused to. She ended up inviting me to hers. After weeks of convincing, I went. I remember sitting in the parking lot very tempted to text her and say I can’t make it. But then I realized “wait, I prayed for this.” I prayed before going in and said “God, if I’m supposed to be here, make it known.” And He sure did.